Saturday, April 16, 2011

Pain Is Universal

Pain is universal!! Whether its pain of loss, physical pain, emotional pain, spiritual pain--no matter what kind or how it manifests--pain is the same. This may not be exact, but, if you close your eyes, and take yourself to a place where you completely feel everything in and about your life that hurts--that's the place where you get the main ideas of pain. You can't get away from your hurt(s) and all coping mechanisms of all kinds don't fix it. You understand insanity cause you think you aren't far from it right now or some time in your past. Pain is isolating and you feel all alone. Pushing people away and avoiding the public, is a normal human response to chronic pain. Imagine this: Its the middle of the night. You may or may not be alone in your home, but, either way, you are the only one awake. Our kids who love us unconditionally, and can be our greatest cheerleaders, but they are asleep and you would never wake them to share pain. Husbands/Wives/Spouses from the best (most supportive) to the worst, are asleep cause they have to work tomorrow or do whatever it is they do. You are alone with your pain. Alone, Isolated, Desolate, Desperate......This IS PAIN and, if you have felt its grip, than you get it. I used to share a Facebook (FB) account with my husband, Jason, and we have many friends. All alone in the middle of the night, I was/am still alone with my pain. It doesn't matter how many friends you have on FB, MySpace, Twitter, email contacts, etc. In pain, eventually we all notice at some point that we are alone with our hurt(s). This is a place to springboard from positively or negatively through conscious choice no matter whether we are children or adults in pain. Choose wisely, my friends!! Our attitudes about our pain, our life, our family, our doctors, etc, affect everything we do and say. I choose to be thankful. That's right---thankful!! My pain has brought me many blessings. I will further discuss those in future posts. Guilt is a common side affect of pain. The person in pain feels guilty about how their pain affects others in their life--friends and/or family. I believe there is a lot of guilt on both sides of pain. The friends or family watching their loved one in pain, feel guilty asking anything of the one in pain even if they should ask in the example of the Father/child or Mother/child relationship. My kids have told me over and over that they leave things out or don't tell me things at all, cause they don't want to increase my pain. Jason has told me the same thing more than once. I don't want to be out of the loop, and no one does, but its a side affect of pain that few ever discuss. It is with this in mind, that I created this group to provide a place for the open discussion of all types of pain. Living with pain--no matter what kind--seems to have the same side affects on us all. Through sharing, I hope that others will feel not so alone. Post on the wall, start your own discussion, upload pictures and videos related to pain, and generally support each other through the toughest thing that life can send us-- PAIN. I hope by finding common ground, we can all face life with a brighter future. I will post again soon, and promise not to ignore or delete anything posted by any of you unless it hurts some one else. Feel free to complain, rant, discuss, argue, compliment, support, help, or communicate in any way that helps you. You will be pleasantly surprised at how many people GET where you are coming from. Welcome to Pain Sufferers Speak!!! Liz : )

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