Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Living With An Invisible Illness

While from the outside I may seem normal,
It’s the part that you can’t see,
The constant pain and struggles within,
Are ever so apparent to me.
Although I may wear a smile,
Often times it's covering the tears,
Yet not tears because of sadness,
As it often may appear.
Don’t be too quick to judge though,
Because there is so much more than is known,
What may seem to look like one thing,
Just might turn to prove so wrong.
I may sometimes seem unfriendly,
Or too centered around self,
Because sometimes standing takes all I’ve got,
And there is just no energy left.
Sometimes my words may sound awkward,
My communication may not always convey,
My true inner thoughts and feelings,
Aren’t always expressed by what I say.
You may think that I’m not really listening,
Sometimes my face or speech may not show,
But I do hear every word you say,
I really want you to know.
The information doesn’t always process,
As quickly and as clear,
And sometimes it takes me longer,
To interpret what I hear.
I possibly miss many opportunities,
To offer needed love or support,
Because sometimes it just takes to long,
For my thoughts and words to sort.
So if my actions seem inappropriate,
In the things I say or do,
I hope that you can understand,
That it is not because of you.
There are times I get discouraged,
When forced to accept my inability--
It’s hard to admit my limitations,
And it leaves me feeling so guilty.
Yet every moment is a reminder
As I look all around,
The effort it takes just to get through the day,
Just picking my feet up off the ground.
I am not looking to find pity,
I am just attempting to explain,
That the person that you may often see,
And the real me aren’t exactly the same.
You may not see the peace and joy,
When you look upon my face,
But I know that each day I live,
Is because of God’s amazing grace.
It is hard to always be cheerful,
When the pain is so very real,
And not everyone can comprehend,
The extend of how I feel.
I don’t see it as all bad though,
Although I’d much rather it not be so,
But I know that if I must endure,
God will strengthen me as I go.
It may seem as if I take no pride
In the way that I look or dress,
However, there might be much more going on,
Inside of the big mess.
My home may not be nice and neat,
My bed not always made,
The laundry may not all be done,
And often it makes me ashamed.
But I must only do what I am able,
Each day I have to choose,
What is most important right then,
And the tasks I am able to lose.
All the plans and dreams I once held,
Now don’t seem quite so clear,
Yet I feel a peace within,
As my Lord keeps drawing me near.
To have a chronic illness,
Or a disability that one must bear,
Somehow puts life into perspective,
And helps to make us more aware.
I realize now that each day I live,
Is a gift from God above,
It is hard not to lean on Him,
Or to look to His great love.
I now can fully understand,
On my own, there is nothing I can do,
It is only be faith and prayer,
That I can make it through.
It may seem an exaggeration,
No one can always feel so bad,
But only those who have walked in these shoes,
Can appreciate the battles that I have had.
I see so many people less fortunate than me,
Don’t have to look very far,
There are so many suffering all around,
It doesn’t matter who you are.
Circumstances and illnesses can hit unexpectedly,
And you can never really be prepared,
It may be difficult to understand,
Leaving you vulnerable and feeling scared.
I must constantly guard my thoughts and mind,
As Satan always tries to bring me down,
He wants me to feel hopeless and unworthy,
And turn my smile into a frown.
It is hard not to get depressed,
When I see the burden my family must bare,
The fact I cannot always meet their needs,
No one could be more aware.
There are times I feel like giving up,
When I look too far ahead,
But I know if my loved ones were given the choice,
They would just choose to have me here instead.
There are so many ups and downs,
New challenges each day,
I must strive to keep my eyes on God,
So that I be not led astray.
It would be so difficult to cope,
Without God, my hope would all be gone,
Because through submitting to Him in prayer,
Is when my weaknesses are made strong.
So when you see the way I look,
When my insecurities are in view,
Base who I am on what’s inside,
Not by the things that I can do.
The greatest lesson that I have ever learned,
Is the reason that I am here on earth,
Is not to live for self and gain,
For in these things are not my worth.
God has a purpose for my life,
Although the details I may not see,
He still has it under control,
And is continually watching over me.
Maybe one day I will be well,
And my health He will restore,
But if that is not in God’s will,
I will still praise Him ever more.
If this suffering can bring honor to Him,
I will gladly accept the call,
Because of His great love for me,
He suffered and gave His all.
I have to believe that what I am going through now,
Will somehow work together for good,
And one day it will be revealed,
And all things will be understood.
While I still worry about what you think,
More the example that I may show,
I am learning so much more each day,
And this has really helped me to grow.

By: Mary Hastings, Written May 2003

Remember: Pain Sufferers Speak's Global Community respects all religions, faiths, and beliefs. 

This was shared on Pain Sufferers Speak's Support Family Group on Facebook by Auntie Stacey Bryce . We have 345 members in our private community and if you wish to join, just send a request to my email or facebook. 



Love to all my Pain Brothers & Pain Sisters All over the world!!
Liz : )

On Letting Go

To "let go" does not mean to stop caring.
It means I can't do it for someone else.
To "let go" is not to cut myself off.
It's the realization that I can't control another.
To "let go" is to admit powerlessness,
which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To "let go" is not to try to change or blame another.
It's to make the most of myself.
To "let go" is not to care for, but to care about.
To "let go" is not to fix, but to be supportive.
To "let go" is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.
To "let go" is not to be in the middle, arranging all the outcomes,
but to allow others to affect their own destinies.
To "let go" is not to deny, but to accept.
To "let go" is not to nag, scold, or argue,
but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.
To "let go" is not to adjust everything to my desires,
but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.
To "let go" is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.
To "let go" is to fear less and to love more.
Author Unknown
Shared by Sharon Johnson on Pain Sufferers Speak's Support Family Group on Facebook. Let me know if you want to join and I will happily add you to our private community.
Wishing all of you a productive week filled with happiness and love!!
Liz : )

Thursday, October 20, 2011


Life will throw many negatives your way.
Sometimes you'll laugh.
Sometimes you'll cry.
That's the very essence of you being alive!
You'll have good days and you'll have bad.
Sometimes you'll feel you're riding high,
While others you'll feel you're in a pit.
Both feelings and all in between, are part of life, my friend.
You will have sickness from time to time,
Or even perhaps have a loved one die.
Sometimes you will have plenty,
While others just barely getting by.
But in the midst of all the tears and pain,
How you react will make the difference in life.
Remember to smile and wave until the grave!
May not be easy, but it's the only way.
Written By: Rogelio Gomez

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Monster Inside Of Me

I have been ill now for sixteen long years,
Every time I'm up, my illness reappears.
It is like a monster's just eating at me,
...Oh help me God, I just want to be free.
When I get this way I just want to flee,
Free of the pain that is inside of me.
I ask myself if God is even listening,
Because this pain I have is so piercing.
Physically, I can do nothing, except for sitting all day,
I have guilt and sadness, and my world is painted grey.
These feelings I have never seem to stray,
They make me feel like I want to hide away.
The depression I get is truly the worst,
It makes me feel as though I've been cursed.
Everyday I pray on bended knee,
Why is God not listening to me?
Most days I just want it to mend,
The pain is so great, maybe it'll end.
My kids think this monster is such a crime,
They have helped me through my worst of times.
I don't understand the reason why,
God makes me feel like I want to die.
One day I will know the answer from our Lord,
And maybe I'll get my just reward.
All I can do is continue to pray,
For God to stand by me and not go away.
To protect and guide me through this ghastly ordeal,
To mask and to conceal this pain that's surreal.
~Author Unknown

Happiness, Peace and Joy You Will Find

The law of attraction does not care
What ever you’re thinking will take you there
It does not matter who you are
Or what ever state you’re in
You have the power in you,
And this is where you begin
Think of a memory that makes you feel great
Now hold it right there till you’re fixed in that state
This blocks out any negative woe
You do have the power to just let it go
Feeling grateful is a great place to be
It’s that sparkling feeling inside of thee
When you’re grateful you’re thinking in a positive way
It keeps you on track of your habit per say
When you can conquer your state of mind
Happiness, peace, and joy you will find!!!
Love Simone
From the group "Great People"
Shared by Jacqueline Lamoureux on
Pain Sufferers Speak's Support Family
Group on Facebook

I Am An African

I am an African
Not because I was born there
But because my heart beats with Africa’s
I am an African
Not because my skin is black
But because my mind is engaged by Africa
I am an African
Not because I live on its soil
But because my soul is at home in Africa
When Africa weeps for her children
My cheeks are stained with tears
When Africa honours her elders
My head is bowed in respect
When Africa mourns for her victims
My hands are joined in prayer
When Africa celebrates her triumphs
My feet are alive with dancing
I am an African
For her blue skies take my breath away
And my hope for the future is bright
I am an African
For her people greet me as family
And teach me the meaning of community
I am an African
For her wildness quenches my spirit
And brings me closer to the source of life
When the music of Africa beats in the wind
My blood pulses to its rhythm
And I become the essence of sound
When the colours of Africa dazzle in the sun
My senses drink in its rainbow
And I become the palette of nature
When the stories of Africa echo round the fire
My feet walk in its pathways
And I become the footprints of history
I am an African
Because she is the cradle of our birth
And nurtures an ancient wisdom
I am an African
Because she lives in the world’s shadow
And bursts with a radiant luminosity
I am an African
Because she is the land of tomorrow
And I recognise her gifts as sacred
***By: Wayne Visser

Monday, October 10, 2011

Introducing (and finally going public) Pain Sufferers Speak RAW

Right now you are reading this post on Pain Sufferers Speak's Main Blog For Everyone.

***Now I want to introduce our global community's 2nd Blog for ADULTS ONLY called Pain Sufferers Speak RAW!***

Warning: Some Profanity and Adult Content and Gritty Daily Reality Guaranteed!!
Here is the description for the Blog:
"Unplugged and unsensored. I am gonna cuss, rant, discuss my views on controversial topics, shower chair antics, wheelchairs I wish to leave behind, poop talk, piss, puke, unhealthy relationships in my past. Gonna be a wild RAW unsensored Ride for Pain Sufferers Speak. Still intend to respect privacy, and basic ethics of course.  No lies of omission here 100% Unsensored. This is the REAL WORLD so if you want the REAL DEAL subscribe to my RSS Feed and pull up your big boy pants or big girl panties--This blogs for you! Willing to share only because I refuse to accept that I am the only one this stuff happens to.  Love to have your input, thoughts, comments, questions or snide remarks anytime!"

So come join me for an unsensored ride through life with chronic pain and illness. Its gonna be a bumpy fun ride, Pain Brothers and Pain Sisters!!

Click the link below to go directly to Pain Sufferers Speak RAW "Adults Only" Blog
The "Multi Elements" to Pain Sufferers Speak's Global Community are: 1) our Main Blog--Pain Sufferers Speak; 2) our "For Adults Only" Blog--Pain Sufferers Speak RAW; 3) Facebook Community Page with over 50 Showcase topics loaded with FREE INFO; 4) Twitter as @painspeaks; 5) our EXCLUSIVE "Members Only Secret Family Support Facebook Group" with 24/7 support for everyone; 6) OPEN GROUP on LinkedIn called Pain Sufferers Speak just for FREE PROMOTION and Expanding Your Professional Network, 7) BranchOut, Facebook's Professional profile builder, 8) Vitality Link profile, 9) We are traded now on Empire Avenue as PAINSPEAKS / Liz Hall, 10) connect.me profile for networking and community growth--We have the rare priviledge of being chosen as a Founding Trust Anchor on their site.
Each part is unique and has different benefits--Join only 1 part OR all---Its up to you!!

Liz : )

People May Scatter, But Hope For Your Future IS A Choice

Wanna figure out who your real friends are? Live in chronic pain or be diagnosed with a chronic illness and people scatter--I know because I have seen it happen in my own life. I am always the strong one to such an extent that a cousin of mine (who I am very close to) actually told me to suck it up at my Grandma's funeral!! She said she couldn't take if I was gonna cry. That was in 2000 and I was not capable of telling her how I really felt about what she said then and I never have, because I know it would change our relationship forever in a negative way. When others don't understand that being strong only hides pain, but it does not erase it. Plus when others don't live with pain, then they tend to judge you and maybe not even believe your pain. This judgment can come from family and friends--When I was recovering from my first back surgery at age 24 not one of my friends came to visit me at first. Finally after 4 weeks my best friend in the world came and gave me a sponge bath and I actually cried--not because it hurt (it did big time) but more because she was the only one. I lost everyone else who I thought were real friends--turns out they were fair weather friends. Only a handful of my relatives visited and a few others sent cards and I come from a huge family!! Now I know who my real friends and family are, and I only count on them. It sucks to be alone in pain. It hurts physically, emotionally and spiritually--it is like a death. Someone finally told me I was mourning the loss of my former healthy self and my career. I think we all do our share of mourning and should give space and time to feel that. We go through the same process--denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally acceptance--its the 5 stages of grief. Yes, showing your pain or grief or emotions takes strength and the more you show the stronger you are. That is not to say that if you are not ready for acceptance that you should be stronger--its a process and each stage is necessary and needs and takes time. You must give yourself permission to take the time and feel each stage. Each person takes a different amount of time with each stage--no pressure to rush because then it will only take longer. You must love and accept yourself first (and most importantly) before you will ever get out of the depression phase. That was hardest for me to accept. I didn't want to love the new "broken" me--with degenerative disk disease that has invaded my once healthy and strong back--now 4 disks are herniated and I have neuropathy down both legs with burning pain and numb spots that cause my balance to be off and me to fall occasionally. How could I love that? How could anyone love that? My husband of 18 years answered these questions best when he said, "How could I stop loving you? I commited to 'in sickness and in health' and I meant it. Your disability and failing body took nothing away from my love for you." The reality of his unconditional love brought me back from depression. If he could love me this way, then I had to find a way to love myself. I do love and value myself again, and I hope as you read these words that you have found a way to love yourself, too. Some of you are stronger than me, and will find a way to love yourself without anyone else. You know that your disability, illness, pain or suffering is only a part of you, it is NOT all of you. Your limitations do NOT have to define you or limit your mind......unless you let them. I have found amazing inner strength and inner beauty in everyone who suffers with chronic pain and chronic illness, or lives with any type of disability. My sincere hope is that you can, not only see these traits in yourself, but you can harness them and use them to reach your goals and acheive your dreams. From your goals and dreams, you create hope for the future--which is necessary for us all. Don't let the changes you see in your body stop you from having goals and dreams and hope for the future!!!

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Many Blessings From All Over the World

Posted by: Mimi Glover

"Mother, Father, God, Goddess, Universal Power.
Remind us daily of the sanctity of all life.
Touch our hearts with the glorious oneness of all creation.
As we strive to respect all the living beings on this planet.
Penetrate our souls with the beauty of this earth,
as we attune ourselves to the rhythm and flow of the seasons.
Awaken our minds, with the knowledge to achieve
a world in perfect harmony. Grant us the wisdom to realize
that we can have heaven on earth." - Jo Poore

Posted By: Estee Wesley
Posted By: LouAnn Wilmoth

Posted By: Sharon Johnson

"Peace is not something you wish for; It's something you make,
something you do, something you are, and
something you give away." --Robert Fulghum
Posted by: Jacqueline Lamoureux

Posted By: Auntie Stacey Bryce

Posted By: Julie Bame

Posted By: Deborah Clemmons
Posted By: Patricia Gonzalez Guerra-Lara
Seek God, Be FREE from all that Binds U. Love and pray for those who persecute you..
Remember that God loved u first..... Amen.... Thank u Jesus ♥♥




Posted By: Carolina Breunesse

Posted By: Monique Millender

Posted By: Cindy Blevins
These are posts from many Pain Sisters from all over the world!  I got permission from all of them to share these with all of you. I would love to have you send me your favorite blessing, quote, picture, poem, bible verse, anything that has a special meaning for you and your family, your culture, your religion or set of beliefs! Love to include stuff from all of you on Pain Sufferers Speak's Blog! Next post will be from the Pain Brothers! Get those entries to me as soon as possible!

Send them to my email:
Or my facebook:

Sending you love, hugs and showers of blessings always! Liz : )

Friday, October 7, 2011

The Family That Prays Together, Stays Together

Let's rally together
In good times,
And in stormy weather,
Let's rally together!

Let's continue to rejoice
When things are at their peak,
Or though the way be bleak,
Let's continue to rejoice!

Let's sing His song
When all doth roll along,
E'en when we feel we've lost our song,
Let's sing His song!

Let's pray and pray more
When there be an open door,
And when we feel we cannot anymore,
Let's pray and pray more!

Let's honour our king
In everything!
For "He" is the "One"
From whom all things come!
We have had a Sioux Indian Prayer, a Buddhist Healing Prayer and so I thought this was a great addition to our Prayers from all over the Globe!
Thank you Elaine Walker for posting this beautiful prayer!
Remember: Pain Sufferers Speak's Global Community respects all religions, faiths, and beliefs. We accept everyone for exactly who they are and we love all our Pain Brothers and Pain Sisters all over the world!! Wishing you all many blessings and sending each of you love and hugs! Liz : )